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#4921 Management » Hey guys... » 614 weeks ago

mitchejw
Replies: 15

Just a suggestion here....but feeling as nostalgic as I do at the moment, I was wondering if you might dedicate some portion of this site to its own history. It's kind of crazy that it still exists. Especially considering the whole issue surrounding about 2008. What do you think?

#4922 Re: Guns N' Roses » MYGNR EXCLUSIVE: BREAKING NEWS ON GNR PLANS FOR 2014 » 614 weeks ago

This is quite exciting news.....is it for real though? Why on my gnr?

#4923 The Sunset Strip » How do you start a band? » 619 weeks ago

mitchejw
Replies: 0

Really....my question is that general.

I play some decent guitar and sing pretty well. I'm looking to find one or two people to start playing with. I am by no means a professional, but I was in a band that practiced 3-4 times per week about 10 years ago. I'm not ready be a full blown adult.

Also, if someone could give me some basics about equipment and what you have to have these days to be taken seriously. Amps? Pedals? Someone reen lighten me to the music scene.

#4924 Re: Guns N' Roses » Update from Fernando » 620 weeks ago

Yeah, I appreciate the attempt at trying to make us feel apart of this....but gnr never needed help making vague promises and statements about the future that something will happen, and something usually does happen, 1-3 years later.

My point is....it's follow through that they really need to work on. The small, surprise shows with quant audiences are such a great idea. For promotion and good will. For showing that axl isn't always just an ass hole. Ideas like that are golden. And the perfect venue to give snippets of new songs that would tease the fan base into a frenzy.

Yea.... That's what we need more of...

#4926 Re: Guns N' Roses » Cathouse 1989...holy shit » 626 weeks ago

That is really nice stuff...I often wondered why there aren't more concerts available in high quality...specifically from the band. I can't really say why, but I've always thought the Tokyo DVDs were shit. I don't know if they just weren't well done or the band wasn't on their A game. But, I've always thought that the sound sucked. Maybe it's just me..

#4927 Re: The Garden » Pope resigns, new Pope. » 652 weeks ago

This makes me sick to my stomach. Wtf!

#4928 Re: The Garden » an adventure in self exploration » 658 weeks ago

monkeychow wrote:

Hmm. Tough situation.

As has been said, I think if you're too negative about it you risk pushing her away.

Firstly because it could be seen as too controlling, and lacking trust - like how often when people are continually falsely accused of cheating they end up going and doing it as payback. It's sort of like if you do the time for it anyway you might as well do the crime or something. Odd but it happens.

Secondly, because if it does relate to some kind of sexual need or fantasy or deeper interest of hers, shutting it down could really alienate her. Think about your response if she blocked your sexual needs by refusing particular deeds or insisting on only certain ways or whatever. She'd suddenly seem boring and inhibiting what you could be doing.

Or of course maybe it's not sexual at all....maybe she just wants to get buff or something and it seems cooler than the gym...don't want to jump to conclusions.

One approach might be to consider what about it turns her on and find ways to scratch that itch that don't upset you. Is it the exhibitionism angle? Maybe you guys could do stuff in places where u might get caught, or like have her flash you when you're out and about or something like that. Or is it the idea of strangers? If so you could look into role play or something. Is it just she feels sexy when watched in which case she could dance for you or otherwise develop more visual aspects to foreplay, or maybe it's just the sense of appreciation - let her know more often she's hot? I dunno...hope i'm not running my mouth here...just pondering some ideas...don't mean it disrespectfully.

Even if she is hell bent on it....it could also just be one part of her personality...doesn't mean she'd have any interest in leaving you or anything like that. Might just be like how you might notice a girl on TV is good looking. You could still be the man she loves and so on...but she finds it hot to dance for others. So you don't want to jump to conclusions too much.

Anyhow...I'd proceed with caution as if she's keen on it being negative could really upset her...but at the same time I can understand the hesitation too....but I'd look into if there's a way to embrace it without crossing your lines too much.

I like this response...and I do agree...this is mostly about my own insecurities. I most definitely wouldn't want to push her away. And you're right...and I think I did that...and it hurt a little. Nothing that I couldn't fix...but she was so excited to share the idea with me...and I realize I reacted somewhat negatively...

Still...the fact remains that I feel threatened (hopefully temporarily) by this constant need for her (and many girls') need to be seen. Attention! Attention! Attention! Look at me!!! I guess the question I keep asking myself is, "will my attention every be enough?"

#4929 Re: The Garden » an adventure in self exploration » 658 weeks ago

Saikin wrote:

It sounds like your girlfriend liked, and still continues to like, that kind of attention she gets when she's baring most of her body to people.  That's not necessarily a bad thing either.  As far as you've said, she's never actually received money for performing sex acts.  So all she's done is play the occasional stripper while drunk.  The reason she sounded like she was bragging while telling you this is that there's a common misconception that all straight men would love to date and marry strippers. 

But what gives you the right to tell her that she can't take pole dancing classes because the thought that someone else might see her do it in the future makes you uncomfortable?  If it's what she wants to do, then you need to get over your own insecurities about it and let her do it.  Not only is it something she can call upon in the future to spice up your love life, but it's also a great way to stay in shape. 

You have every right to feel the way that you do.  And if this is not something you are looking for in a partner, then I would advise you to think this over, and talk it over. 

But most of all, don't see it as a threat to your relationship.  And who knows, this could be just a passing fancy and go away on its own.

I see what you're saying. I don't want to, nor do I feel like it would foster a healthy relationship to try to stifle her "needs."

At the same time, I feel all sorts of double standards going on here...in general, and in this situation specifically. What if the situation was reversed? Perhaps it's the context that frustrates me...she was EXTREMELY jealous over a situation in which another woman organized an event in my honor less than a week ago. How am I supposed to be cool with her "needs" for attention when she is so threatened by anyone giving me any...it's bull...

Believe me, I want to resolve this in a healthy way...but sometimes telling your girlfriend that she's inconsistent doesn't go very well...or do women usually get to have their cake and eat it too? 16

#4930 Re: The Garden » an adventure in self exploration » 658 weeks ago

RussTCB wrote:

I get what you're saying. This isn't the same thing, but I've always wanted Stacey to refrain from bartending because she'd have to actively flirt with dudes to get them to buy more drinks and thus get herself bigger tips. That would benefit us of course because she'd be bringing more money in the house and wouldn't really be working hard to do so. At the same time, I'm not interested in her having to pretend to have interest in some other dude as part of her job.

Like I said, I realize that this isn't even close to what you're talking about but it's somewhere in the same realm I think. At least it's the best example I can think of to say I wouldn't be cool with it.

Yes...i too believe that what you experienced, are experiencing, is similar. Truth is...sometimes I hate how flaunty she can be. She really enjoys the attention. I believe that you imply that she doesn't enjoy it and does it reluctantly. Am I wrong?

Your girl that is....

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